So today for the first time I took my five children to to pool. Stone and Phoenix were properly attired for the team. BTW: The Speedo's of this generation....boys...are much less nut hugging. I am sure that I can speak for us all when I say it is a welcomed change! lol. They each had their goggles and Phoenix "forgot" her cap as she was a bit unsure about the whole thing but once she got there and saw all the other girls with one on she was then asking for the one she hid from me before we left the house.
(I am going to skip the Stone swimming story for now and just focus on Phoenix...I will hit Stone on a different day as it is just as amusing in its own right)
So I was sitting on the side of the pool in the humidity, smelling the familiar smells, hearing the familiar sounds, getting splashed by the teenage girl in the far lane who obviously needing work on her kick. I sat there feeling tortured that I had to sit on the sidelines to a sport which runs through my blood. There was nothing I wanted more than to be in the water but this wasn't about me as I found Phoenix swimming and was filled with pride as I watched her and my legacy live on.
My parents had told me as a child that they put me in the water and that I just kind of began to swim. I believed that until I gave birth to Stone and the boy sank in the water like and anchor. It took a lot of work to get him to learn to blow bubbles let alone float...heaven forbid something that actually resembled swimming. Then when Phoenix was three and she attended Pre-School at St. Andrew's (which is where we were actually practicing tonight) Once a week the Pre-School program had a free swim for all the kids and I took Phoenix. I am not lying when I say the girl just started to swim. (by swim I mean floating doggy paddle) On the first day I had her in the pool she went off the diving board and swam to the other side to climb up the ladder by herself. I was amazed...I guess my parents weren't mistaken in their old age!
So here we are almost four years later...in the same exact pool and I am watching my little protege do her thing. She is swimming like a 8 and under champ...A few strokes that resemble freestyle, some doggypaddle, and at least one break per lap for a second or two on the wall. I was so proud!
And then it Happened...Swimmers to the Block.
I walked over with my camera phone in hand like the goofiest mother in the world...I couldn't believe I was actually going to get a picture of my daughter on the block for the first time in her life...I'm sure I looked goofy to all the other parents, but I did not care. I was fighting back the tears which were welling up inside me. My heart knew the weight of this situation ~ My oldest daughter was standing on the deck. She took the first step and then the second...The instructor told her to wrap her toes around the block...I snapped a picture as my life was flashing before my eyes yet knowing this moment had nothing to do with me...I was proud...I was almost passing the torch if you will. It felt as if I was giving my daughter one of my greatest gifts ~the secret to my happiness to my self esteem to my strengh. To the knowledge that I can and will do anything I put my mind to. All of these things I learned about myself by being one place and my daughter was standing there and had just looked over the glory of it all and was jumping in with both feet. It is my hope that she will know these things about herself...If she doesn't learn them through the pool as I did just as long as she learns them!
When we got home I told her how proud I was of her that she finished the whole practice and kept on swimming even though I know it was hard. She said to me that it really was hard and that she wanted to quit many times but that she really likes to swim in the pool and even though one time she thought she was going to drowned she didn't and she wont ever give up.
~That's my girl~
6 comments:
Ok, tears. Yeah, tears. And yet more tears. I am right there with you. It is so bittersweet to be reminded of something so sacred of your past, but only in a mother's eyes can you find yourself fighting back the tears of nothing but love and gratitude for the moment you get to share with your child. I was never a real swimmer, but I could feel your love through your words and how much it meant to see her little toes wrapped around that block, knowing this was her thing. One of the biggest blessings of having children is feeling your own soul carried through another. Love you girl, thanks for sharing this. I needed it.
As I said on the phone, that was just beautiful. Giving your child the things that shaped the person you are is such a wonderful gift. Hopefully one day she will understand how much this moment ment to you and will share the same with her children.
Okay Chris that was seriously beautiful. There is nothing like sharing with your children the things that meant so much to you. Of course my problem is letting them try the things I struggled with and not try to shield them or protect them too much.
You always have such a way with words. How is it you can have me laughing and then crying in just a matter of minutes?
By the way I got Jon all worked up about the whole scouting thing. He was almost encouraging me to pick up the phone....I didn't...yet
Woah! That was deep! You're awesome!
this swimming thing is so foreign to me! growing up in utah, i knew no one who did swimming like you marylanders. but good for everyone involved, you included!
Seriously, my eyes were tearing just reading this. I want so badly for my kids to be on swim team too. Hopefully one day one of mine will love it too!
Post a Comment